LIE TO ME

Submitted for your approval, the curious cases of Manny Ramirez and David Beckham.

Mannywood had a grand re-opening last week, celebrating the return of its star after a 50-game suspension plus another 13 days away from Chavez Ravine. Even after being connected with baseball’s NASCAR set (“if you ain’t cheatin’, you ain’t tryin’”), Manny received a welcome fit for a bona fide luminary in a town that loves a showman.

Contrast that with the return of Becks to the L.A. Galaxy and the Home Depot Center. Hecklers, angry signs and general unpleasantness. Beckham faced the kind of vitriol that Angelenos usually reserve for…well, not much.

It was partially his misfortune to make his re-debut against AC Milan, the team he left Los Angeles to play for last season. Kind of like inviting your mistress to a family barbecue with the wife and kids. Very awkward – especially when you’ve said that you’d like to go back to that mistress at the first opportunity.

Beckham has been a disappointment at every turn. For the non-soccer fan, he can never live up to the hype that surrounded him when he arrived here. It would be like Jason Kidd going abroad to boost basketball’s popularity. He’s a little older and his skills have diminished. But even in his prime his strengths were as a distributor and not as a scorer.

Yet even for the soccer literate, Becks hasn’t done much to endear himself. After leaving Real Madrid and signing a five-year, $250 million contract with the Galaxy (a gargantuan deal for any sport, let alone one that has only a niche following), it took barely one season before he was looking for the first flight out of town. Add injuries that took him off the pitch and inconsistent play when he was on it and Beckham was a Tommy gun away from being John Dillinger.

It even got so bad that Galaxy teammate Landon Donovan took shots at Beckham in a new book, calling him a “bad teammate” and accusing him of not caring about the squad. Donovan later apologized for using the media to lodge his complaints, though he never recanted anything he wrote about Beckham.

Meanwhile, Manny is as happy-go-lucky as ever. In the pantheon of bad athlete behavior, his transgression was far worse than anything Beckham has been accused of. The difference is that there is a simple joy in Manny. He smiles. He plays hard (more often than not). He interacts with his teammates and contributes to the clubhouse culture.

Does that mean a Manny meltdown isn’t going to happen? Not at all. In fact, there are quite a few people (mostly outside of Los Angeles) waiting for that shoe to drop. Yet in the interim, he’s convinced everyone that he’s happy where he is.

It’s easy to feel alienated by players’ salaries. Sure, they work hard at what they do. But what they do isn’t exactly hard work. As sports fans, sometimes we just want our athletes to show a little gratitude – even if it isn’t totally genuine.

With all apologies to Fleetwood Mac, tell me lies. Tell me sweet little lies.

Maybe something is lost in translation between American and European sports fans. Maybe Beckham redeems himself in the next few months. Maybe Manny blows all of his goodwill by defaming Dodger Dogs. But for now, there’s little doubt who’s learned the game better.

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